Through the Fire

         These three are examples of women who have been through fire and don't smell like smoke.  (Daniel 3:27)  They go through life's struggles and still have faith unwavering and joy unending, all because of Jesus.  All of their struggles and hardships are different, but very real.

      This Mother's Day I was woken up by an earthquake at 4am.  It was yet another reminder about how life is precious and unpredictable, and how much we have to be thankful for.  We have been given another day to praise Him and make Him known.  This year, more than any other, God has reminded me over and over again that my life verse is true.  (Acts 20:24)  None of these earthly things move us to the point of losing hope.  My life is worth nothing to me if I am not sharing about His grace, so that others can experience the genuine joy that these ladies have in Christ.

     Lord, may we bring honor to your name as we spread Your glory wherever we are.  Help us to walk through the trials of this life, filled with the knowledge and assurance that you are with us through the fire, giving us the ability to rejoice in all things.  You are so worthy of our lives being fully surrendered to You.  Help us to be faithful.

Suffering

We have a Savior who suffered and comforts us in our suffering....

         Isaiah 53:3-5

3 

HE was despised and rejected by men,

    a Man of Sorrows and acquainted with grief;

and as One from whom men hide their faces

     HE was despised, and we esteemed HIM not.

4 

Surely HE has borne our griefs

and carried our sorrows;

yet we esteemed HIM stricken,

    smitten by God, and afflicted.

5 

But HE was pierced for our transgressions;

    HE was crushed for our iniquities;

upon HIM was the chastisement that brought us peace,

    and with HIS wounds we are healed.

Less than two weeks ago I watched one of my good friends bury her mom. Although her mom was 79 years old, it was, of course, too soon for my friend, and it hurt to watch her hurt. 

On Good Friday, I sat next to a lady who had recently lost her son.  He was around my age.  With compassion, it made me humbly think more about what happened on that glorious, horrific day. 

Yesterday, I stood in the ICU waiting area with a friend whose 12 year old son has been diagnosed with Sepsis and had been given a grim prognosis. 

This morning we received word that one of our good friends who served with us in Macedonia is in the ICU from bleeding and clotting in the brain. 

There is a heaviness in my heart that can only be bore by the Lord.  I can’t pretend to know what each of these four families is going through right now, or why they are being asked to bear so much. I do know this truth...

^“ In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials,  so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”  (1 Peter 1:6-7)

 I do know that they have a Savior, a wonderful all-caring and all-knowing Savior that grieves with them, that holds them, and that catches every tear.  

“You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?”  (Psalm 56:8)

I know God will use each of these trials to bring glory to Himself, but I want to be able to take it away, to make it easier.  

I’ve seen how He, “...comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” (2 Corinthians 1:4) I know in my head there is a greater purpose in the suffering.  I know that there is growth and closeness in the Lord through it.  I know. 

But, I almost hate how life just goes on. There are groceries to buy, meals to fix, birthday parties to plan, meetings to go to.

We can forget, get consumed, get numb to it all.  The suffering around us is so great.  The same God who can heal, may not.  He is still good.  There is no escaping death, just delaying it.  The ache lessens with the years, but never goes away. 

“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.” Isaiah 43:2

When.....not if. 

WHEN you pass through the waters,

WHEN you walk through the fire.

“"For I am the LORD your God, The Holy One of Israel, your Savior...” Isaiah 43:3a

He is with us the WHOLE time.  He suffered and comforts us in our suffering.  

Anticipation

Seems my little family doesn't always share my love of the new things we experience living over here.  Kaleb was in soccer last year before we left for the states, and though he enjoyed it, we thought he had decided that basketball was more "his" thing.  If his current size is any indication of things, he's more of the basketball type anyways :)

So...the day came a few days ago for him to start basketball.  I kid you not, there was a literal hour of drama filled crying and wailing about being afraid to go.  Afraid that he wouldn't be able to make a basket, that he would be the worst one, that the other kids would laugh.  You name it, he had anticipated the worst.

We do that sometimes, don't we.  Anticipate the worst possible scenario.  Cling to what we know, the easy way.  'Do hard things' is a newer phrase that is hard to live out.  Who wants to do hard things?  Well, he went and had a blast.  Made a ton of baskets, had fun with the other kids, and he wasn't the worst one.  Ha!  It doesn't always turn out that way.  But, it reminded me that the anticipation of what's ahead is many times worse than the reality.

Skopje is different.  I won't say bad, but it is so different than what we've known the past 8 years.  I claim to be a city girl.  I'm not sure that is the case any more.  I've missed life in Prilep more than I ever thought I would.  I knew I would miss the countless friends who have become family, but I didn't anticipate how I would miss living there.

I admit, part of it is because every new start is hard.  It was hard 10 years ago when we landed in Skopje, it was hard 8 years ago when we moved our life to Prilep.  New beginnings are hard.  Period.  We are starting over.  It's exciting, scary, and stretching.  It's made me rely more on the Spirit like I should do all the time.  Pray with us that we would seek His face continually as we navigate all this 'new' and embrace the differences instead of wishing things looked differently.  Pray that there would be less 'wailing' as we anticipate the hard things that are ahead.  :)

Haven't We Done This Before?

It's been far too long since I have gotten on this thing...so much so, that I truly forgot how to post.  Ha.  Jeff thinks I live my life in blog posts in the way I share stories and updates with people.

So, here goes a post after all this time...

Years ago, I wrote a blog post called 'Unexpected' where I told about the time I accidentally got a root canal without anesthesia. :)   If there is one word I would NOT use to describe our life over here,  it would be predictable.  It's really okay though.  I hate getting stuck in ruts and I seriously like change most of the time (I know I am crazy).

So yesterday as I bused all over Skopje with three seven year olds and a six year old, it would have been boring if everything had gone smoothly.  The way there was fun, even easy and relaxing after I relearned how to buy a bus ticket.  Seems we go to America for a couple of months, and they have changed their whole pricing and system.  There we were on our double decker experience across town.  We were killing time and heading to the lego festival at the mall, which was a fun, and best of all, free, adventure.

Coming back we couldn't find the right bus stop and eventually ended up on the wrong bus due to some well-meaning misinformation.  We won't blame Jeff though ;)  ha!  It did,however, take us in the right general direction, so I didn't realize it was the wrong bus until we were in our part of town.  I hurriedly got the kids off the bus, rushing them out as they are literally chanting, "no troll left behind."  HA!  I can't make this stuff up....

It took me a few minutes, but I figured out where we were and managed to corral the kids in my mini-daycare on major streets, trying to dodge traffic (really not as bad as it sounds).  The whole time the kids were just happily along for the ride (or walk)....and I kept thinking I wish I could be more child-like and carefree sometimes.  It was a finish up with a (secret stash) Big Cup Reese's kind of day that reminded me once again that I still have much to learn in my unpredictable world.

Alabaster Jar

“Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.”

Luke 7:47

Such a beautiful picture, the story of the sinful woman washing Jesus’ feet with her tears.  

As true followers of Christ, we have all been forgiven of much.  

It’s just a matter of how aware we are of our condition.  

Revival happens when we become aware of just how sinful we are.  

Whether it’s open sin or pharisaical, it’s still sin that has to be forgiven.  

Love of our Savior exponentially increases as we realize how very much we need to be saved. 

 Saved from ourselves.  

From our sinfulness.  

For His glory.

Lord, give me a daily awareness of how much I have been forgiven of and continue to be forgiven for.  

Help me to love others with the same Love You pour out on me.  

With the grace I have been given, please help me to shower that grace on others. 

One Shade of Grace

Great Love.  Rich in Mercy.  Full of Grace. 

There is only one shade of Grace and there is nothing gray about it.  It is Jesus! 

 I am increasingly saddened at the state of our world.  

At how quickly the world sees sin as acceptable.  

Sin that just 10 or 20 years would be labeled as such, is now applauded and celebrated.  

I just finished reading Counter Culture by David Platt and I am both convicted of sin in my life and moved to pray more for people all over this world to turn dramatically from their sins and to turn to Jesus.  

His love is the only true love and it is so great! 

God is rich in mercy and if we surrender to Him, He will make us alive with Christ.  

True life that doesn’t satisfy self, but seeks satisfaction in Christ alone. 

People all over the world are dead in their transgressions, but by Grace they can be saved.  

Lord, I pray for sin to lose it’s luster in people’s hearts and for Your perfect love to overwhelm them instead.  

I pray for conviction from Your Holy Spirit to fall in huge ways among masses of people.  

I pray for real revival and for people to glorify You, Jesus, instead of sin and the fleeting pleasures of this world that is falling apart.  

Thank you God for Your amazing Grace that saved a wretch like me!